


Forced Friendship (RusAme)

by venturesomeScout



Category: CountryHumans
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Personified countries, United Nation as their teacher
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-06-03
Packaged: 2019-11-16 05:09:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 14,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18088025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/venturesomeScout/pseuds/venturesomeScout
Summary: Countryhumans Highschool AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this on Wattpad as well. Just so you know.  
> Btw there is supossed to be italic text for Russia's thoughts, but I kinda can't figure out how this works on AO3...  
> So if a sentence starts with "I" or ends with "...Russia thougt" you know what's up.

(Note: This story is set in high school.)

Russia rarely cried and when he did, he was a silent crier. Sometimes other students would be able to recognize some red puffiness in his eyes, but no one ever dared to ask about it due to his reputation.

Russia carefully locked the bathroom stall and then let himself crouch on the toilet seat. He quickly let his arms wrap around his legs and then threw his head into them to muffle his quiet sobs. He made a big mistake today.

Russia always has dreamed of a big happy family, but since his father died, things seem to fall apart. Why does Ukraine want to leave them and join the EU? Russia took a deep breath and wiped away some tears as he remembered what happened some minutes ago.

It happened in P.E. Their teacher (UN*) wanted them to form groups. Russia of course expected Belarus and Ukraine to be in a group with him, but Ukraine walked over to Germany and Poland instead. There had this fight a million times before, but never in front of others. Russia blinked in annoyance. "Ukraine?" She looked over to him, but instead of saying anything, she just shrugged with an grin and turned around again. He angrily formed his hands into fists, but then heard Poland whispering something to France.

"I told you, he is scary. He is exactly like his father. At least Germany isn't."

That has stung. Russia's hands began shaking, but luckily Belarus gently touched Russia's shoulders. "Don't worry about it." Afterwards Belarus walked off to get an ball for their game of soccer. Russia watched him as a method to calm down.

The game went on for awhile, until Russia stumbled over Germany's feet in a bad attempt to steal the ball from the other team. His knees slammed down on the fake lawn and he could feel them burning in soft pain. Russia heard a laugh from the other side of the match field and as he looked up, he could see America holding his stomach. That's it! He angrily jumped onto his feet and America's laughter immediately quiet down. Russia tried to walk over to the other country, but Ukraine grabbed him by one of his arm. "Russia, calm down! He just laughed!"

With a swift movement he turned around and let the fist, that was previously meant for America, end up in Ukraine's face. She immediately landed on the ground from the strong blow and her hand went up to her red cheek. Tears began forming in her eyes. "Blyat... I- I didn't meant to..." Russia nervously stuttered over his own words. Everyone went dead silent for a moment and just stared at the two siblings.

Russia wanted to hold his hand out to Ukraine, but Germany stepped into Russia's view before he could do anything. He helped Ukraine up and then looked into Russia's eyes with an serious expression. "I think it would be best if you take a break." Other countries agreed with an mumble or nod. "But..." 

"Russia!" UN* yelled and everyone turned their heads to the teacher. "Time-out for you!"Russia swallowed bitterly and walked off the match field.

"It's only getting worse..." Poland whispered to France again. Anxiously Russia's eyes searched for his brother Belarus, but when he looked at him, he could only see disappointment in his eyes. The whispering became worse and at that moment he knew he fucked up badly. Quickly he told his teacher he needed to use the bathroom and disappeared.

Remembering what happened only made Russia cry even more, because it confirmed that it was all his fault. The tears came rushing out worse than ever before. "Blyat... No, stop." He wiped away his tears, but it was no use. "What's wrong with me?" He asked himself in frustration and sniffed again. He closed his eyes and looked back to the good days with his dad.

Most of the people were glad that USSR was gone now, but Russia just couldn't help himself and miss him. He felt like while his dad was still alive, his family was so much happier. Every time Russia was sad, Soviet would gently give him a kiss on his forehead. Now he was gone forever and everyone expected Russia to be a strong and responsible country. Someone who never makes any mistakes or cried, but he just couldn't meet their demands. Quickly he was known as the country you should rather not talk to in school. "He is dangerous."he would be able to hear students whisper. It made him feel utterly miserable, but today only proved why they were so right about those prejudices they had about him. He wasn't in right to complain.

Russia sighed heavily and touched his forehead with his hands. "Dad..." He sniffed one more time.

Suddenly he could hear the bathroom door opening with a loud slam. It made the Russian almost fall off the toilet seat in surprise. Nervously he slammed his hands over his mouth and angrily thought who ever wanted to take a piss right now, should do it quickly. His hopes flew out of the window as he heard the person speak up.

"Russia I know you are in here." It was America's voice. What is America doing here? He slowly let his hands drop and grabbed for the toilet seat instead. "Wh- What do you want?" His face went red in embarrassment after he realized that he had stuttered. This was humiliating. He didn't want anyone to see or hear him like that, especially not America.

Instead of answering to Russia's question, the American walked over to his stall and leaned his forehead against it. He stood perfectly still. It was silent for a moment. Then America spoke up. "Don't listen to them. Don't listen to anything they say, not a single word. Because they're wrong and you know it." Silence again. Russia really didn't expect that America would say that.

Russia opened the door to his stall and America flew over in surprise. "Holy shit!" He yelled, but Russia luckily caught him. "You're okay?" Russia chuckled and America looked up at him with a slightly red face. "Yeah, I'm fi-" He stopped as he saw the tears in Russia's eyes. "Are you okay though?!" He quickly asked. Russia sniffed with an awkward smile in his face. "Yeaaah." America closed the toilet stall door behind them and then wrapped his arms around Russia for a hug.

Russia's face turned as red as a tomato. He wasn't sure what to do. "Just hug me back already, you idiot." America chuckled and strengthened his embrace. Russia laughed in embarrassment, but eventually hugged him back. His tears slowly began to stop rolling down his face. "Thank you... and... I'm sorry." America smiled. "You don't have to say sorry. I shouldn't have laughed, so I'm sorry."

America let go of Russia. "You should probably apologize to your sister though." He added and Russia awkwardly looked at the stall wall. "Yep..." America chuckled again. "Didn't know you could be this cute." He realized that his flirt backfired as Russia gave him a death glare. "If you tell anyone about this, I will rip you in pieces. We're still enemies." America's chuckle died down. "Don't worry about it, big guy. I won't." Russia sighed in relief and his expression turned softer again.

They both smiled at each other.

UN* = United Nations, The United Nations is an international organization formed in 1945.


	2. Chapter 2

The school bell rang loudly and echoed through the classrooms. Quickly silence turned into a loud noises of students talking and laughing. Russia left the classroom in a hurry and as he arrived at his locker, he threw his biology book into it. Afterwards he looked around the hallway. He realized how everyone walked atleast 10 feet (3 meters) around him. He could feel his heart sink and searched for his siblings in the crowd. Russia played around with his bandages on his right arm, while worrying if his siblings maybe wouldn't want to walk back home with him, because of the incident.

Eventually he spotted Ukraine walking next to Poland. Poland told her a joke and she laughed. Quickly Russia made his way over to his sister. "Ukraine." he simply said. She turned her head around to look at him. Her cheek was still red and as she looked at him, her cheerful expression from earlier quickly turned into a face of displeasure. "What do you want?" She asked in a cold tone. Poland just kind of stood there, awkwardly staring at Russia. "I thought we could walk home together. Like always?" Russia asked, trying his hardest to keep his voice steady. Poland's stare was making him nervous.

"And i want to apologize." he added with an sad smile. Poland squinted his eyes at Russia's words, probably judging Russia in silence. Ukraine didn't say anything for a moment and just looked at Poland, then back to her brother. "I won't go home with you today. Poland, Germany and I wanted to hang out now." She said monotonous. Russia tried to ask a question: "Can I come wi-", but he got interuppted. "No." she simply answered. "Why not?!" Russia's voice accidentally became louder as intended. "So you can stalk me and make sure I don't join the EU? No thanks." She said back. Poland snickered, but shut up again as he saw Russia's angry expression.

And then he finally spoke up. "What's your proplem? Let Ukraine have her freedom too! You're so controlling!" Something in Poland must have snapped, because at this point he was already screaming. A few students stopped walking and watched the drama happening infront of them instead. "I don't know if you already forgot what your father did, but he treated so many people like shit!" Russia gulped, he already knew were this was going. "And if you haven't realized, he treated your siblings like a birds in a cage, but you were his favorite! And now surprise, surprise! You're doing the exact same as him! Ukraine told us everything and I just can't stand here anymore, while not saying anythi-" He stopped mid-sentence, because Ukraine shook his shoulders.

"I'm fine. Don't worry about it." Only now Russia realized that a lot more students were watching them at this time. Poland's loud voice must have attracted them. They were staring, whispering and someone even snapped a photo. Russia's face went pale. Eventually Ukraine spoke up again. "There's nothing to see here! Stop staring!" She said with an glare to the other students and they began going back to their previously activities.

Afterwards she turned to Russia with an sad smile. "Look I understand this is hard for you," She didn't. "but this is what I want. See you later, /rodnoy brat/." (brother) She gently touched Russia's shoulders in a bad attempt for comfort, before turning around to Poland again. Poland just stared at Russia. He didn't seem to regret what he had said to Russia. "Let's go." Ukraine said and they turned around together, leaving Russia to awkwardy stand in the hallway.

Russia took a deep breath and walked to the nearest wall to let himself lean against it. He sighed heavily. He spotted Belarus on the other side of the hallway. For a moment Russia was excited to see him and wanted to ask him to go home together, but when he saw the dissapointment in his eyes again, he hesitated. Before he could make the deciosion to ask him anything, Belarus turned around and left. Russia wondered if he was also mad at him.

This whole day was a giantic flop. He felt horrible, but didn't wanted to cry again. He was too exhausted for that. So instead he closed his eyes, trying to forget for a moment about what had happend. I will just go home alone in a second, he thought to himself. 

"Yo Russia!" His eyes shot open in surprise. His eyes widend even more as he saw America standing infront of him. It's him again? That scenario they had in the bathroom earlier that day was already weird enough and now America was acting even weirder. Russia didn't even have time to think about it for long, because America began laughing. "You should see your face right now! You look soooo confused!" Russia looked back at him in annoyance.

"So this is why you came. You came to make fun of me, huh? Well, that makes more sense." Russia didn't really expect an answer from the American. He just turned around and walked in the the direction of the school gate. "Wait" America ran after him. "Let's hang out." he said with an grin while walking next to him. "What?" Russia asked in confusion and pushed open a door. "I don't know what suddenly got into you, but I already told you this earlier: We are still enemies." Russia explained while continuing to walk. "Also..."

He looked to the ground. "This would surely ruin your good reputation." Russia's voice was softer than before. America blinked a few times, pushed up his glasses and then gently patted Russia on the back. "Aww, do you worry about me?" Russia shot him a glare and removed America's hand from his back with a slap. "Well, then don't worry, since I frankly don't care what other think about me." Russia groaned. "I can see that."

America continued to follow him. "You know I won't let you into the house, right?" Russia eventually chuckled. "Wow" America just answered as he placed a hand over his chest while faking dissapointment. He actually didn't expect Russia to let him in anyway. 

They just walked next to eachother in silence for awhile. Russia wasn't sure how to fell about it, but it wasn't a bad exprience or feeling. Suprsingly. He really didn't expext that America would be the one person cheering him up after such an bad day though. He couldn't suppress a smile.


	3. Chapter 3

It was afternoon. Russia's siblings still weren't home from school yet. He wondered what they were doing. The usually so full house was quiet. Russia layed on the couch and lazily looked at the photos which were hung up on the wall. Most of them were family photos. Soviet is, or rather has been, the father of 20 children and 15 of them still exist to this day. Russa turned himself to the other side, now laying on his back. He wondered if what Poland had said was true. The only reason Russia didn't saw Soviet as such an horrible person is, because he supossed to be his favorite child? But what does Poland know about their family?! He crossed his arms. Poland might be a a Slav too, but that doesn't mean he knew Soviet like Russia did. Wait. Didn't he say Ukraine told him everything? What does "everything" even mean?

Suddenly he heard the front door swing open. Russia fell off the couch in surprise and hit his head. "Ugh..." he hold his head in soft pain and then quickly looked up. Belarus stood in the living room and stared down at his brother. "Are you okay?" He walked over to him and hold out his hand for Russia to take. Hesitantly he took the hand and Belarus helped him up. "Borsch is in the kitchen." Russia mumbled. Belarus looked surprised. "You made borsch?" he asked, tilting his head lightly.

"Da!" Russia said excitingly. "Dad used to make it often and I thought I would make is as an apology." Belarus smiled sadly. "That was a good idea." Russia blinked. "Sooo... do you want some borsch?" But instead of going to the kitchen, Belarus shook his head. "Nyet sorry, I already ate something on the way." The silence between them wasn't comfortable, it was awkward. "Oh..." Russia simply said.

"I visited the Baltics today." Belarus eventually said. The Baltics moved out some years ago. (Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania) They enjoyed their independence after Soviet's death. "Why didn't you tell me earlier, we could have invited them for lunch!" The taller country said and crossed his arms. Belarus just sighed. "I don't think that would have been a good idea, Russia." He answered. 

"You get easily angry latetly. Especially if it has anything to do with our siblings... uh... going their own way." Russia just stared back at Belarus. He knew exactly that he was alluding to the his conflict with Ukraine. "I w-wouldn't have-" "Russia." Belarus looked tired. He obviously didn't want to argue about this. Russia shit his mouth as Belarus gentley patted his shoulders. "Just not today, okay?" Belarus added and then removed his hands off Russia's shoulders again. Without adding anymore words, he walked passed Russia and walked upstairs. 

Russia sighed and stared back at the front door. Ukraine still weren't home yet. Russia wondered if she was okay. He took his phone out of his pocked and quickly texted her: "When will you be home?" And sent.

His stomach growled. He was hunrgy, but he just didn't felt like eating. He wanted to eat together with one of his siblings. Not alone. He hated being alone. He heard his phone ring. His eyes switched back to his screen. It was an message for Ukraine. "We are having a sleepover. Japan is here too. She gave me some pajamas." He put his phone back into his pockets. He tried his best to convince himself that Ukraine wasn't just sleeping over at Germany's place, because she wanted to avoid Russia, but it wasn't working. He anxiously rubbed over the bandages on his right arm. 

Eventually he made his way upsatirs and went straight to his bed room. He flopped on his bed. His door stood open, giving him a perfect view to the bathroom. He took a shaky beath and turned to the other side, so he was facing the wall instead. He stared down at the bandages around his arm. Then her curled into himlself. He would be strong for his Dad.

He closed his eyes, but didn't had the oppurtunity to fall asleep, because he heard a knock. He shut open his eyes again and straightened to sit cross-legged. Belarus stood in the door frame. "It's still early." He commented. "Are you sure you want to sleep already?" Russia wasn't sure if he actually was tired or just exhausted. Sleeping could probably help him get bad thoughts of his mind. Russia just shrugged as an answer to his brother's question. 

There was silence between them for a moment. Afterwards Belarus sighed and walked into Russia's room. The walls of his room were painted in an soft yellow and his bed sheets were blue. Belarus gently put his hand on Russia's shoulders like he did so often. "I know this is hard for you, ..." This again. No, he didn't either. "but you will eventually get over this too." Belarus said and gave Russia a smile. "We always made it through bad days, right?" We, Russia bitterely thought. Russia felt really weak at that moment, but Belarus's smile looked so sincere. He didn't want to ruin the moment. He coulnd't recall the last time Belarus talked to him like that afterall.

So Russia gently brushed Belarus's hands off his shoulders, even though he immediately missed them again. "Yeah, you're right... Thanks." Russika faked an smile. Even if Russia would explain his worries to Belarus now, it wasn't like Russia really understood himself either. He just felt so lonely, despite that Belarus was here now. And maybe the students in school were right and he was just being an huge egoistical asshole. He tried his hardest not to tense up. Russia wanted his brother to leave again, now suddenly worried that he would say something that he would later regret.

"I'm actually really tired though. I was up all night yesterday." He rushed the excuse out. Belarus nodded understanding and walked back to the door frame. He was still smiling. "Should I close the door then?" He pointed at it and Russia quickly nodded. Belarus dissapeared behind the dark wooden door. Immediately Russia let himself fall back down on his bed. He swung his blanket over himself, too emotional too care that he was still wearing his clothes and his ushanka was carelessly thrown at the night desk next to him. All he wanted to do now was sleep. Escape the reality he was in for now and deal with it tomorrow instead. He closed his eyes.

Before he could actually fall asleep though, he thought about America and why he was suddenly so nice to him. Welp, he would have to find out tomorrow.


	4. Chapter 4

It was still dark and quiet outside as Russia woke up. Obviously when you go to bed earlier, you would wake up earlier as well. He just kind of layed in bed for awhile, until it got too boring and he forced himself up. He changed into some new clothes and thought that he maybe he should stop exposing his arms like that, because y'know maybe one day the permanent bandage on his arm would be considered weird... He shrugged it off, it didn't seem to get a lot of attention.

His stomach growled and he rushed downstairs. He now regreted not eating lunch and dinner yesterday. He opend up the fridge and saw the container with borsch from yesterday. He filled a plate for himself and warmed it up in the mircowave. Afterwards he put the container back into the fridge. He ate the soup in a hurry. It didn't taste as good as Soviet's borsch would have, but Russia thought he made a pretty decent borsch... Or he was just hungry. He felt a bit proud nonetheless. Belarus really is missing out. As he quitely ate his good, he imagined his sibling would be sitting around the table as well. Soviet would always set on the far left. He smiled.

Russia arrived at school early. He saw some posters hanging next to the entrance. "Prom night" was written on it with fat red letters. Russia didn't really care about that, so he lazily walked over to the school building and let himself lean against the wall. He quickly texted Belarus that he was already at school, so he wouldn't wait for him.

"Hey, stop fighting!" Russia heard a voice call out from the right side of the building. He could assign the voice in an instant. It was America's. As silent as possible he turned his body to the right and lurked around the corner.

America was standing between North Korea and South Korea. South Korea had an black eye and it was probably made by his brother. "I'm sure we can solve this!" America nervously laughed at the brothers, waving his hands in the air like Italy would when he talks about Pizza. "Stop getting into other's buisness, United States of Idiots!" North Korea shouted back at him. "Stop playing the hero, you're just an annoying asshole!" South Korea seemed to be too scared to speak up. Russia just watched.

"You can be glad I didn't nuke you!" North Korea now said, pushing America away. America stumbled a step back, but didn't fall. He protectively hold an hand infront of South Korea. "Oh, really now?" America's smile turned into something creepy. "You're bluffing. Also, you do know I have the most nuclear weapons in the world?" Russia gulped. If North Korea ever starts an school shooting, America is probably the first one on his list. Russia didn't want to witness that.

North Korea's face went red in anger, but instead of talking back he turned around and stromed off. Right into Russia's direction... North Korea stopped as he saw Russia standing in his view. Russia awkwardly waved at him and now also America and South Korea spotted him. Russia stepped away from the wall, into a better view, and raised his arm. "Yo."

Somehow North Korea's got even more annoyed by that. His hands turned into fists and he turned back around to his brother and America. He stared at his brother intesely. "One superpower wasn't eneogh, so you had to get another involded into this? That Freak Russia?!" He pointed at him and North Korea could only blink back at his brother in confusion. "What? No, I didn't invite-" South Korea cut him off. "We will talk about this later." he spat out and now finally stormed off for real. 

North Korea's face twisted in horror. "Oh no..." He shakingly placed his hands on his pale cheeks in an attempt to calm himself down. "You're okay?" America asked him and he just shook his head. "Not really, but just leave me alone for now, okay? Your help already helped enough... Just stop playing the hero for once." He said bitterely and walked off as well. America's face was one full of guilt.

Now America and Russia akwardly stood there alone. Some birds were chirping in the background, but otherwise it was pretty quiet. "Uh, sorry about that." Russia eventually said, not sure how America would react. America needed some time to respond, probably to think about what to say. "It's okay." He just choked out.

"I bet he hates everyone and everything." America eventually continued their conversation. "The closest he can get to an significant other is a nuke." Russia just blinked at America. Was he honestly gossiping about North Korea with him? It was silent for a moment again. "Soo... About yesterday." America began and Russia suddenly tensed up. "Are we friends now?"

For a moment Russia wanted to say sure, but it would feel wrong. During the cold war the western countries always have been his family's enemy, but America has been the biggest enemy of them all. Sometimes he can't help himself and blame his father's death on America. If America wouldn't exist, his Dad would probably still be here with him now. Maybe he was just bitter, but he couldn't anwer America with a yes.

"No and stop trying so goddamn hard, Idiot." Russia said codly and turned around, but then a thought hit Russia. Russia always has been plagued by all those stereotypes and expectations other students are giving him, but America actually never has been any diffrent. And here he was doing the exact same to America, like the people that made him secretly fell so utterly miserable and ashamed of himself.

Quickly he turned around again. America stood there like an statue. At first Russia was confused, but then he realized how tense America actually was. His hands were sweaty and he was slighty biting on his lips. Russia bet that if America's sunglasses wouldn't hide his eyes, he would be able to spot some tears building up.

But before Russia could take it all back America spoke up. "What's your fucking problem?! I know we had a rough start, but what did I do to you, for you to hate me so much?!" His hands turned into fist. Russia's eyes squinted. Didn't that behaviour remind him of someone?


	5. Chapter 5

Russia tried to collect the right words to say. He tried to find something to to disprove America's words, but he couldn't find any... Because the longer he thought about it, the less he wanted to admit that he didn't hate America. And he began thinking that maybe, just maybe, he really does hate America. It was like there was an unknown power pressing down the needed words to stop this upcoming conflict from happening. And so instead of saying that he didn't hate America, he spit on the ground. 

"The cold war was a battle of propaganda, America." The words left his mouth without much thinking about it. America tilted his head in confusion. "What are you trying to say?" America asked and he raised one of his hands. Russia tensed, preparing for a punch that never came. Instead of punching Russia, America just rubbed the eyes under his sunglasses. He is wiping away tears, Russia thought to himself.

"This propaganda war..." Russia continued. "All those prejudices, expectations..." There was a moment of silence. "It never really ended, huh? I was no naive. I thought that after the cold war, you would hold yourself out off the conflicts of other countries. But here you are, still doing the same thing. You are just making it worse. Didn't you hear South Korea's words? The korean war was something between them both. Not YOU and your stupid hate for communism! You are no hero, you are just one of the reason why WE can't have nice things!" Russia yelled at America, who flinched at the sudden emotional outburst from Russia.

Russia took a step forward, closing the gap between him and America. "But only I have to deal with the stupid consequences from the past, while you are doing the same shit all over again and again! It's not fucking fair!" He grabbed for America's shoulders and pushed him up against the wall. His anger was getting the better of him. "So of course I hate you!"

Wait, no. I didn't want to say that. That's not true. That's a lie. I'm just jealous. 

Russia's face went blank as he saw America's sunglasses slip out of place from the powerful push. He was now able to see America's face staring back at him. He looked scared.

Suddenly Russia heard the footsteps of other students coming closer. They were talking to eachother. Immediately his anxiexty spiked up in worry. He quickly turned his head to the left while he was still pressing America's body against the wall. America's leg were dangling in the air.

America used the distraction of the students to raise his legs and then, with a swift movement, he forcefully kicked his feet into Russia's stomach. The attacked country let out a yelp and dropped America on the ground. Russia held his stomach in pain and his surrounding blurred into lights and shadows for a moment. What just happend? What is going on? Russia was confused.

He had no time to recover from the blow, because now he could feel arms pressing around his neck. "What the-" He wasn't able to end his sentence, because the hands tightend the grip. Quickly Russia realized that America had him in a headlock. 

"You asshole..." America mumbled out. Russia realized there were tears dropping down on the bright green lawn, but it weren't his tears. The tears were from America. "I was only trying to help. You are so mean, you know? Why do you never unstand me..." Russia let out a snort. His head was getting dizzy from the lack of oxygen. It was hard to even make out America's words. What was he trying to archive with this anyway? Russia needed to breathe.

His hands struggled desperatly against America's arm in no avail and then, withouth thinking about it for too long, he just let his teeth sink into America's arm. His sharp teeth easily broke America's white skin and blood gathered at the sunken wound. He was able to taste some of the blood in his mouth. Immediately the damaged arm around Russia's neck loosend and Russia took the opportunity to free himself from the headlock. 

He quickly gasped for air and wasn't able to suppress some coughs. As Russia glared back into America's eyes he was surprised to see no expression of anger or disgust in his face. Quite the opposite actually: America just looked really sad. Russia stared back at the other country in confusion.

"Don't look at me like that, you just tried to kill me!" Russia shouted and America corrected the postion of his sunglasses, successfully hiding his eyes behind the sunglasses again. "You attacked me first! And if trapping you in a headlock is the only way to make you listen to me, so be it!" It was obvious that America was a bit angry now as well.

Russia was about to tackle America to the ground, but suddenly someone grabbed him by his collar, preventing the attack from happening. He let out a sound of displeasure. 

"Stop this nonsense, Rosiya." Russia went quiet as he realized that it was Ukraine's voice. Before he could say anything, another voice spoke up. "What happend here?" Ukraine, America and Russia looked up into United Nation's eyes.

America was the first one to speak up. "Russia started it." He said as he crossed his arms. "Oh, you little shi-" Russia wanted to yell something back at him, but Ukraine shut him up by softly hitting the back of his head. Russia rubbed that place of his head in embarrassment. Soviet used to shut him up the same way. United Nation just sighed. "You both are going to detention today after school. You heard me? I don't want you both to start another war." He gave them a glare. Quickly the countries nodded in agreement.

Canada ran up to them as United Nation took his leave. "Brother! Are you okay?" He asked and poked America's still lighty bleeding arm. The wound looked awful and painful. America stared at Russia with an unreadable expression for a moment, before he turned his head to his brother. "Yeah, let's go." he said with a more cheerful voice and Russia was sure he was just faking his happiness, because he was able to see America rubbing the wound on his arm in pain. "We should bandage it." Canada said as they both walked to the school entrance. Their voices grew quieter and Russia couldn't make it out what they were saying anymore. Class was probably starting soon.

The realization of what just happend sank deeper in as the brothers were gone. Russia could feel his stomach ache at the thought. He didn't want to see America again. Not in detention. Not in school - Never again in general. He didn't want to deal with this. He turned around to his sister. 

"I'm sorry-"   
"No. Don't say that. We both know you are not."  
"No, I really am-"  
"Shut up."

She had a cold look on her face and even though she was smaller than Russia, he felt a bit threated by her expression and harsh tone.

"You wonder why people hate you-"  
"Wait no, let me expla-"   
"and then you do stupid stuff like this! Do you even think about how this affects other people as well? You know, other people, like me?!" She threw her hands in the air in anger. 

She shoved her brother out of he way, almost making him trip over a stone, and then walked past him. He wanted to shout something after her. Something mean. Something hateful. But he swallowed it down. There was eneogh damage done for today. Then he thought about what she said and felt even worse. She had a good point. America actually helped him yesterday, but all he did as a repayment was making him cry and giving him a bleeding arm. Wow. I really am a asshole, huh?

He dropped his head and just stared at the ground for a moment. He listend to the footsteps of Ukraine leaving. Some students whispered to eachother as they walked past Russia. For once, Russia just blurred them out of his mind. Where is all this anger coming from anyway? Russia thought to himself and looked at his hands. Am I really like my father? His eyes widend at this terrifying thought and he shook his head. No, no, no. Never.

He forced himself to look up again as he heard the bell rang. He was going to be late. With a heavy sigh he made his way to the school entrance. He just hoped this day would be over quick, so he could lock himself up in his room for the rest of the day. 

As Russia sat in class he couldn't concentrate. He was worried about the detention. He wasn't sure what would happen if he was trapped in a room with America for too many minutes, but then he shook his head and forced himself to work on his math worksheet. Everything will be okay.


	6. Chapter 6

The school bell rang and for once the shrill noise didn't make Russia reliefed, but worried instead. He didn't want to go to this stupid detention. He frustradely slammed his math book in his locker and then closed it. He sighed and stared down the corridor at the school exist. He wondered if he could make a run for it before any teacher would see him.

Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulders and almost screamed out loud in surprise. Luckily, he didn't do such thing and turned his head to the owner of the head instead.

United Nation stood next to him with an strict look on his face. His white laurel wreath looked a bit crooked and if he wouldn't look so threatening with his tallness, it would be funny. "No getting out of this for you." He simpy said and Russia looked at the teacher in disbelief. "How the fuck did he know?", questioned Russia himself in his mind, but didn't actually ask UN about it.

The teacher grabbed for Russia's wrist, the one that was bandaged, and then dragged the country with him through the corridors. He felt like some kind of criminal. Unfortunately, UN was walking too fast, which lead to Russia almost tripping over literally nothing. And that not only once, but twice. So Russia stumbled after UN with a bit of struggle. It must have looked funny, because Russia could hear Poland laughing as they walked past the smaller country.

Quickly Russia shot Poland a death glare and ignored that his face was heating up in embarassment. Immediately Poland shut his mouth and suddenly seemed to be in quite a hurry. He ran over to Germany and France. The taller country rolled his eyes at the other country's action while he contintued to follow the teacher. "в семье не без урода." Russia mumbled. (*V sem'ye ne bez uroda./ There's a black sheep in every family.)

They stopped dead in their tracks at the music room. America was already leaning against the room. He stared at Russia at first and then his eyes went lower, down to his wrists. He eyed them in curiosity and Russia's breath hitched. He didn't like it when people stared at his arms. In an instant Russia teared his wrists out of UN's grip. America looked up again. "Did you try to run away or why was he holding your wrist?" America shot the taller country a dirty grin. Russia rolled his eyes again.

"Just shut up and let's get it over with." he said back. UN rolled his eyes at this as well, but made no comment to it. He began explaining their task. "Some students left the music room in a mess. So I want you to clean it up." The two countries just blinked at UN. This was going to be fun...

"I will lock the door for 90 minutes. When I'm back, I want to see the room clean, okay?" They both nodded in agreement. "I will be next door. So if I hear you two fight again..." He didn't finish his sentence and settled it with a strict glare instead. The two countries quickly nodded again. 

"Perfect!" UN now said with a more cheerful voice and opened the door to the music room. The countries entered without any protest. "Well then..." The teacher stood in the corridor and hold his hand over the door handle. "I will leave you two to it." He said, closed the door behind him and then locked it.

America and Russia just kinda stared at eachother for a whole minute straight while listening to UN's footsteps distancing themselves from their location. Eventually the footsteps stopped and the music room went awkwardly silent.

Russia looked down at America's arm that he has bitten earlier this day. The wounded arm was now bandaged like his own arm, but America apparently scrabbled a bunch of red and blue stars over his. It looked so childish that Russia couldn't suppress a tiny smile. It was kinda cute.

America blinked at Russia in confusion. "Why are you smiling? Enjoying your time with me?" he asked cocky and Russia's smile instantly faded away. He rolled his eyes and nervously walked over to the school desks to inspect them. Literally anything seemed to be better than looking at America at the moment. There was a stain of pudding on one of the desks. A student must have left it here without cleaning it up.

"So no apology for earlier?" America asked and grabbed the red bucket next to him. It was filled with water. "You almost choked me to death, did you expect me not to defend myself somehow?" Russia bitterly said back and turned around to America.

"You are a country, you are not going to die from lack of oxygen." America simply said back, as if it would justify his action. He had a blank look on his face and Russia furrowed his eyebrows together. Russia didn't answer immediately. He stretched his hands out for one of the sponges laying on the windowshell while he thought about his answer.

"Then me biting your arm can't be any worse than you choking me." Russia said and kept his eyes on America as he dunked the sponge into the red water bucket. "Answer me one thing, Russia." America said and Russia almost groaned in annoyance. He turned around with the now wet sponge. "Sure... What is it?" He asked America nonetheless.

"My arm is bandaged becauce you bit me. And well, I can't really think of any person who would be able to seriously hurt you in a fight..." He stopped talking for a moment, then proudly added: "Except me, of course... But it wasn't me, so this still leaves the question: Why is your arm bandaged?" Russia widend his eyes. Noone acutally ever asked him about his bandages. He didn't even make up a stupid excuse for it yet. He regretted wearing a t-shirt now.

He nervously placed the sponge on the dirty school desk and rubbed over it to clean up the pudding. "I, uh..." Russia bit his lips. This was going awful already. "I tried to scale a fence." he wanted to mentally slap himself for his bad lie, but it was too late now. His words already left his mouth.

There was a snort, then silence. A minute passed before America spoke up again. "Russia, you cut your arm didn't you?" Russia almost let the sponge fall to the ground. With shaking hands he tightend his grib around the sponge and turned around to America.

"What the fuck do you want from me?" he snarled back at the slighty smaller country. "So you are not denying that you do?" Russia just huffed. "Wouldn't change a thing now anyway." America rubbed over his own arm. He seemed to be in thoughts.

"Okay, listen." America crossed his arms and Russia stared back at him. It's not like he had any choice to not do so anyway. "I will blackmail you into being my friend." ...

Russia let out a extremly loud laughter. "What the fuck, America." His eyes were almost tearing up at the hilarious thought and he wiped over his eyes, but America just smiled back at Russia. "You will sit with me at the dining table, we will do homework together and all that stuff." Russia shook his head while trying to hold in his laughter. "Or what?" 

"Or I will tell everyone you self harm."  
"... Wait, what-"  
"I mean, even if it isn't true, they would rather believe me than you."  
"You're kidding me. You can't blackmail someone into being your friend."  
"Watch me."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flashbacks start and end with a "___"

The sun was beginning to disappear behind the horizon as Russia and America were finally allowed to leave. As the two countries crossed a park, they were able to see a squirrel desperately trying to steal a nut from another squirrel. As Russia eyed the determined squirrel he couldn't hold back the thought, that this squirrel reminded him oddly much of America. The other squirrel could be him and the nut... oil, obviously. America is so annoyingly obsessed with oil. Russia grimaced in disgust as he realized he was thinking awfully lot of America.

Sohe sighed and turned his head away from the squirrels. He definitely missed family lunch now, since they had to stay longer in school, after he slammed America against one of the school desks in anger.

___

"You're kidding me. You can't blackmail someone into being your friend."  
"Watch me."

Russia was at loss for words. What was he supposed to answer? That sounded absolutely ridiculous to him. Since when did America want to be his friend so badly? It just sounded odd. There has to be more to it than just America wanting to be friends, and honestly, Russia didn't want to find out what that is. He stared at America intensely, what obviously made America nervous and so America anxiously fixed the position of his sunglasses.

"Are you trying to make a joke? You're really bad at this." Russia said. He continued to stare at America, hoping for him to just agree, so they could continue their "enemy relationship" which consisted of ignoring each other and occasional fighting.

The big problem: America didn't. Instead of agreeing with Russia, he shook his head, then pointed some ridiculous finger guns at Russia and smirked while saying: "We are comrades now!"

"..." There was a dead silence.

Russia was super pissed off and the fact that America had to use the word "comrade", that Russia's Dad loved to use so much, made it even worse. And so Russia snapped. This really was today's highscore. He forcefully pushed America against one of the school desks. America hit his head against the table edge with a loud bang. Then he ungracefully slipped down on the ground. It really was a miracle that his head didn't began bleeding.

America's reaction to it was awfully slow and he only let out a "ow", after he was already sitting on the ground. He looked up at Russia while holding his throbbing head with one hand. Russia still looked angry. After that, there was a knock on the door.

"Do I have to separate you?" UN came into the room without waiting for an answer. Russia's eye widened in fear of getting in trouble again as he quickly turned his head to their teacher. "... What are you two doing?" Russia began sweating. Shit, I will definitely get in trouble for that. Russia thought to himself, but then America did something Russia never would have expected from him to do. He made up a excuse... Well, kinda:

"I was just about to give Russia a blow job." America blundered out with fake confidence, but Russia noticed how he began sweating from the tension. UN was so shocked he lost the ability to talk for two whole minutes and Russia just stared at the wall. What the heck.

... And so they had to stay to stay in school even longer, ... but separated.   
Well, it could have turned out worse.

___

"You need some anger management, you know?" America said as he remembered what happened and threw his arms around Russia's shoulder. Without any warning Russia quickly shoved America away from him. "I don't care what you think." he said through clenched teeth.

Russia forced his eyes of America and continued to walk home. They were now walking next to a road and the trees nearby rustled. Surprisingly, America didn't make the effort to run back to Russia's side this time. Instead he sighed and slowed down his pace, letting Russia get away.

When America arrived back at home he let himself fall on the couch in defeat. It was Friday, so it was the end of the week. He wouldn't be able to see Russia tomorrow, except he would decide to show up in front of Russia's front door steps. He sighed again. Why is Russia so hard to talk to?

"You are late." A strict voice said. America slowly raised his head and looked up at his father behind the couch. Canada came down the stairs as well as UK placed his hands on his hips. It didn't look intimidating at all, actually a bit funny instead, but America wouldn't tell him that. "Uh, yeah. sorry." America said sheepishly and scratched the back of his head. It was still a bit painful. If he is unlucky, he would get a bruise from it.

"The teacher called me." UK continued and he gave America a intense stare. America nervously looked to his left and right. "Uhh, he did?" It wasn't really a question. Canada gave his brother a sympathetic smile as UK walked over to his son and placed both of his hands on his shoulders as he said: "Sex in school? Really? I thought I raised you better!"

America began coughing heavily and almost choked on it. "Oh god, are you okay?" Canada asked in worry and walked over to his brother to give him a pat on his back. "You- You- You think I did that?!" America almost screamed at his father in shock while his cheeks began heating up more and more. "Don't hide it, America! The teacher told me and you won't just get away with it like that!" America just grimaced and then hugged Canada so he could hide his embarrassed face. He didn't expect UN to tell his father. Canada patted America's back again while he awkwardly giggled.

"America look at me while I speak!" UK now said in a louder voice. "Well, I gotta be honest with you Dad..." America said and slowly detached his embrace with Canada. "What is it?!" UK growled furiously and crossed his arms over his chest. "I just used the blow job thing as excuse... I guess... I didn't expect UN to tell you." America said while his face was as red as a tomato. "Huh?" His father raised an eyebrow. "What can be worse than having sex in school?" America grimaced,he wished his father would stop calling it by name again and again.

"It's just that Russia pushed me against one of the school desks and I didn't want him to get in trouble for that. So..." America quickly realized that this wasn't a good thing to say. He instantly realized how UK's face turned into a face of even more anger. "Why would you protect him, America?! Bloody hell, I knew he is just like his disgusting communistic father!" America wiggled around with his arms. "Wait no, that's not what I intended to-" UK interrupted him with a "Shoosh".

"It's okay, America. I will speak with the teacher about this." America blinked at his father in disbelief. "Wait no-" But Canada patted America's back gently, as if to say "Just leave it be." America sighed in defeat as UK disappeared in his office.

"You know you can't stop him from doing it." Canada said and looked at his brother with a sad expression.


	8. Chapter 8

It was Friday. America hastily walked over to the school gate with his brother by his side. He didn't like the school at all. He would describe it as super-ancient, but not in the good YuGiOh kind of way... It's just... boring. The fact that his father went to the same school as he was young makes it even worse.

America's stomach ached slightly, but not because he ate any bad food. He is pretty much immune against stuff like that. He had enough chemically improved hamburgers to develop some kind of super stomach. But anyway, it ached, because he was worried about what kind of complaints his father has made to the teachers on the phone yesterday. Of course what happened wasn't true.. Why would he give Russia a blow job anyway? But it was pretty hard to convince teachers about stuff like that. Especially if you are to one who bought that lie to life. The whole situation made America really nervous and it's not like America hasn't realized that Russia seemed to be pretty upset about America's “friendship blackmail”. He didn't want to be Russia's enemy and therefore he thought about how to make things right all night. He even got eye bags from the lack of sleep, but he couldn't find a good solution to-

“America?” His brother carefully poked him in the side. “If you are finished with your flashback episode, you might wanna know, I just saw Russia bypass us.” America blinked at his brother. “Wait what- Where is he?” He managed to get out and rotated in a circle like an idiot. Canada cringed in his mind and then placed his hands on his brother's shoulders. “Maybe a bit less noticeable?” He asked softly with an grin on his face and then ever so slightly pointed at the direction of Russia.

Russia was leaning against a tree while trying to make himself look as small as possible, which isn't really possible if you are the tallest country in the world. He didn't seem to have gotten a lot more sleep than America either. He had eye bags under his eyes and wore a plain blue hoodie. America bit his lips as he stared down at the country's arms for a moment. He made a step forward, winked his brother goodbye and then made his way over to Russia.

“Are you trying to hide? Or what's with that weird posture?” America asked jokingly as he supported his arm on the tree. “So... You were being serious with that blackmail thing?” Russia asked while staring down at his phone. The tall country had a chat open with Ukraine, but America couldn't read it since it was in Russian. Of course America didn't want to force Russia to being his friend, but if it was the only way to make this poor unsocial fuck to do anything, he had to! “Absolutely!” the shorter country said in a lot louder voice than intended.

Immediately Russia closed his phone and slipped it into his hoodie pocket. “Alright.” “Wait what-” The tall country hold a finger in front of America's mouth to keep him from talking. “I said alright, but just so you know... America, I don't trust you. This is weird. - Most importantly, you are weird. I don't know what you get out of being my friend and that's scary. So after my wounds are healed again this poor excuse for an friendship is over.” America figured that he had trouble to get the words out due to his accent getting thicker than usual. “Sure, alright. This pact is officially over after you stop self harming.” America nodded while Russia gave him a glare. “You don't have to say it out loud for everyone to hear, you know?” America was sure he could somehow keep this friendship up, even after his blackmail is “out-of-date”.

Afterwards, the school bell rang. America happily grabbed for Russia's hand and dragged the other country along to the entrance. Russia didn't seemed to be happy about being touched liked that, but he kept his mouth closed and followed America into the big building. “Let's sit together during art class.” America continued their conversation as their headed to the classroom. “Sure, whatever.” America didn't really feel happy about the answer. Since after the fight, that they had, Russia was colder to him than before. Well, it was kinda calculated, but still.

America sat down at the front of the classroom, which was unfortunate for Russia, since he hated sitting at the front. The unusual seatmates instantly got the attention of the other students. To see Russia sit in the front was weird, but seeing Russia sit with America, after they had a fight yesterday, was just a insane sight.

“Holy shit, what happened in the music room yesterday?” Poland asked to Germany as he sat down next to him. They both also sat in the front, one table away from America. The German shrugged, just as confused as his lover. They were about to say more, but got interrupted as the teacher came in. European Union was smaller than NATO, but that didn't mean he wasn't just as intimidating, if not even more. His 12 stars fly just above his head, a little bit like an angel halo. If he really is an angel now is a matter of opinion. EU is Ukraine's favorite teacher, but Russia loathes him. Probably because EU would sometimes treat the other countries like his children. No one could replace Soviet's father figure in Russia's life.

“Alright then students.” EU clapped his hands together to get the students attention. “I have exciting news for you.” Russia groaned at that and America elbowed him to be quite. As EU looked down at America and Russia he was surprised. “Seeing you two sit together is also good news though.” He smiled gently at the boys which was met with a few laughs from other students and then he continued. “We almost have summer break and Japan had the beautiful idea to host an summer festival.” The countries turned around to Japan who was sitting at the back, of course on the left side at the window, like in any anime ever. She smiled happily and waved at them for a moment. “That's right! School summer festivals are common in my country.” America mentally added in his brain: “And in every anime ever.” The students clapped and then turned back to the teacher. “So I have decided that we will do decorations for the festival today!” Now this wasn't met with such delight.


	9. Chapter 9

"That looks funny." America sadly looked down at his failed attempt of a cardboard butterfly as Russia giggled at it. "At least I made some effort, you just painted letters on little stones." America said back and laid his poor excuse of a butterfly down. It had way too sharp edges and the left wing was crooked. "I painted these stones better than you did your butterfly." Russia said in jokingly proud voice and laid the stones with the letters in a specific order on the table. America stared intensely, wondering what it would spell out.

"Idiot." It spelled idiot. America turned his head back to Russia. "Wow, you are really acting like a little shit today." Russia grinned back: "I'm a tall shit. Not little.", but he flinched as EU suddenly appeared behind them. He laid an hand on Russia's shoulders. "Now, now. That's not a nice way to talk to your lover." The tall country almost choke on his own cough. "What?!"

EU smiled gently at the two boys. "England called us at the evening. Something about making sure you two wouldn't have sex in school again." America and Russian weren't sure if EU talked so loud on purpose or if he was just dumb. But let's be honest, it's probably the first. Russia sent America a harsh glare.

All the other students were now staring at them. Their eyes were focused on America's and Russia's faces. They all were wondering if what EU had said was true. "Is that what you did in the music ro-" Poland tried to ask something, but got interrupted by the school bell. EU immediately looked back at his students. "Alright class, clean up and then get your well deserved break!" He didn't say much afterwards. He just left young countries alone in the classroom.

Russia grabbed the small stones, let them slip in his pockets and then immediately rushed out of the classroom. "Russia, wait!" America tried to stop him, but he was already gone. He sighed and started to clean up the remains of the cardboard by himself. Even though Russia said the butterfly looked stupid, he decided to keep it.

Poland walked over to America. "Is it true?" He stared at America intensely. "Did... Did he force you?" America narrowed his eyes. "No, I just-" A crowd formed around America. Russia forcing him? That was kinda an ironic question."You are not really together with Russia, right?" Japan asked. Her eyes looked disappointed and heartbroken. It confused the western country.

Normally America liked attention, but this just felt awkward. He shook his head. "Then why would the teacher say something like that?" Japan pushed and got uncomfortably close to America. "You are not going to the summer festival with him, right?" She took a step closer. America's breath hitched and before Japan could get too close South Korea grabbed her by her elbow. He pulled her back from the taller country.

"Calm down, Japan. Let him talk out." Her cheeks went a bit red in embarrassment and she agreed with an nod. "I'm sorry." she said and bowed, then turned her head to America. "Please explain." All eyes were on America again. It felt weird. This didn't feel like innocent students asking another student if he had a crush. It didn't feel like a harmless slumber party question. No, instead it felt like he had to defend himself against the other students. Like he did something wrong and now he had to come up with some kind of excuse. They wouldn't just let him laugh it off.

Should he say the truth or lie? But his lie was what got him into this mess! "Well..." America started and wished his brother would had art class with him, but his brother had music class in the first two lessons on Friday.

America leaned against his table to look more casual as he spoke up. "I actually lied to the teachers. Russia pushed me and UN heard it. As he made his way over to the music room Russia begged me not to tell him. So..." America's face went red. "I lied and told UN I gave Russia an blow job..." Now that America has said it out loud he felt a lot more stupid for it. His entire face looked like a tomato.

At first their wasn't must of a reaction, just blank stares. The stares burned into America. They probably thought he was stupid. Then everyone started laughing except Japan, who just narrowed her eyes. Germany clapped on America's back as he said: "Typical America, always trying to be the hero." But his voice sounded too serious to take his comment as a compliment or joke.

The crowd slowly disappeared and America could hear Poland softly whisper to Germany: "Isn't he kinda stupid?" It was met with a giggly "Yes, but shoosh." America wished the ground would open up and swallow him whole.

Japan didn't immediately leave like the other students. She stayed, even after South Korea left. Now her and America were the only two countries left in the classroom. "You should tell the teacher" She said with a worried expression on her face. He blinked back at her in confusion. "Why?" His face was still red, but he tried to ignore that the whole situation has been super embarrassing.

"I mean... Russia always had some kind of anger issues. You can't deny that. In my opinion, you should just try to keep your distance." She sounded worried. America narrowed his eyes and thought about it for a moment. Russia is a lot more open to attack than he always gives himself. A good example was the time as America helped Russia out as he had a breakdown in the toilet stall. America didn't want to keep his distance from Russia. He kinda felt like him and Russia were kind of in the same boat. America felt a lot more vulnerable than others think he is. He couldn't tell Japan that.

So he just laughed it off. "Maybe." He smiled at her and tightened his grip around his cardboard butterfly. "It looks cute by the way." Japan suddenly said and pointed at the failed butterfly. America looked down at it for a moment and then pushed the butterflies in Japan's chest. "You can have it." He said without thinking much about it. Her face went red, but America was oblivious to that as he rushed out of the room. "I gotta go!" He quickly winked as he left. He wanted to talk with Russia before the break ended.


	10. Chapter 10

The western country dashed through the hallways, but just wasn't able to find Russia. “Jeez, why do I always fuck everything up...” He mumbled to himself and slumped down as he watched the other countries. Most of them were talking about the upcoming summer festival.

“America?” He looked up to see his brother blankly stare down at him. “What are you doing?” His brother sat down next to him. America swung his arms around his legs, rested his head on his knees and then tilted it to have a better view at Canada. “I don't know. I just feel like every time I try to do something good, I just make it worse somehow.” Canada smiled softly.

“Well, maybe you are just trying to hard.” America raised his head and blinked. Wait a moment. Wasn't that exactly what Russia had said to him as well? America forced a smile on his face. That wasn't helpful at all! What is that supposed to mean anyway? But he didn't ask. “Thanks.” he said.

Back to Russia: He found out that the library was a good place to hide from other countries. It was rarely used after the school kept their computer rooms open. He would just sit down in the corner and look at old books. He was actually surprised that the school had kept them all. Most of them were a lot more interesting than he thought they would be. 

He made his way over to the borrowing lists and searched for the list from 1938. The year before WW2. A lot more names were written down than in 2019. As Russia found Third Reich's name written down for lending a book about “the art of nudity” his stomach turned. A fact he didn't not necessarily wanted to know and hopefully would forget again.

He found out that Soviet has borrowed a book as well. “Red at heart.” The tall country read out quietly to himself and smirked. “Welp, that sounds communistic!” Russia made his way over to the Russian books section. He would borrow this books. It's not like he has better things to do anyway and maybe it could help him with his self harm problems. If he wanted to do it again, he would just read the book instead. When he has finished with the book, maybe his wounds would be healed already and he could finally slap America out of his social life. You could easily tell... Russia was kinda angry about the whole blow job lie.

It wasn't easy to find the book. It was under the bookshelves instead of in them. It was weird, but he didn't think much about it. As he saw the cover, he had to crack up. That's not what he would have expected the book to look like. The cover looked like a teeny romance novel.

Yes, apparently Soviet has borrowed a romance novel. Russia's interest immediately increased by 100. His father reading romances? What?! His father never was a person who would show much of his emotions, so this was definitely news to him. Russia knew that his father had a two love interests in his life: Third Reich and China, but that was about it. Both of them never turned into something serious, but maybe that has been for the better...

He opened the book slowly, scared that the old thing would just collapse in a messy pile of paper. Another surprise awaited him on the first paper. Someone has written notes into the book and Russia could immediately tell who it was. “Holy shit.” Either his father did a huge mistake or he has waited for someone to find it. Maybe he wanted his son to find this.

Russia didn't had time to start reading, because the school bell rang. “Blyat.” The tall country cursed under his breath and quickly put the book in his back bag. He had chemistry now. The chemistry classroom and library were pretty far apart. So he rushed out of the room.

As he made it into the chemistry room a lot of students have already taken their seat. Luckily, America has physics class right now, so Russia took his seat in the back and quietly read the old ass book while the teacher talked about soap or something. Russia didn't really pay any attention, so he can’t recall.

The book was a lot more cheesy than Russia thought it would be. It hold ridiculous long descriptions of the night sky. Two boys sat together at a lake at night and talked about their dreams. Russia wasn't 100% sure, but it sounded like one was quoting stuff from the communist manifesto once while pointing at a star. He had to chuckle. It sounded so stupid.

The tall country turned to the next page. The protagonist in the book said: “You are amazing.” to his love interest. Under it was scribbled: “I'm nothing, but must be everything.” in bad handwriting. Russia was sure it was Soviet's handwriting, but that sentence just confused him. Was he supposed to solve a mystery or what was going on? Did his dad seriously write down his sorrow in a badly written communistic themed love story?

“Russia!” The chemistry teacher, who was NATO by the way, slapped his hands on the teacher's desk. “I would love if you would pay attention in my class.” He said with a strict look on his face. Russia gulped and threw the book back in his back bag. He hope he didn't ruin it which doing so.

After chemistry class was over America shot into the class and immediately walked to Russia, as he spotted him sitting in the back. A few students looked at them with confusion in their eyes, but then decided their break time was more important and left the classroom.

“What do you want?” Russia asked harshly, but America just crossed his arms. He looked like a little kid that didn't get his dessert. “We still have our friendship pact. So you have to spent your break time with me or else...” Russia stood up and looked down at America. “I didn't tell you to fuck off or something, so spare us this speech.” There was silence between them for awhile as they just stared at each other.

“Listen, I'm sorry about what happened at the end of art class. I explained everyo-” Russia interrupted him. “Eh, it's okay.” He shrugged and America stared at him in disbelief. “You literally ran out of the room.” “Okay, maybe I was angry... a little bit.” America chuckled, but Russia didn't  
join in, so America awkwardly stopped and grabbed for Russia's hand.

“Come on, you probably didn't eat during first break too, so let's do that now.”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I fucking hate this chapter. If you liked it anyway, let me know. OOF.

The cafeteria looked "nice" and traditional. The round windows had stained glass like in churches. The walls were made out of scratched white bricks with wooden outlines. It was rather small for the capacity though. EU has suggested for years now to rebuilt it, but a lot of other teachers didn't want to change a thing. They were worried the cafeteria would lose the traditional charm to it.

Japan was standing on a small ladder to attach the first decorations for the upcoming summer festival. It wasn't anything special yet, just paper flowers and stars with some glimmer. America almost had to drag Russia into the cafeteria. He turned around to the taller country with an annoyed expression on his face. "Do you have to be so unwilling with everything that I want to do?" he asked and then groaned. "I'm hungry, dude. Just fucking move."

"You know, you could just eat alone." Russia said unimpressed by America's request. America rolled his eyes. "No, you are my friend." He placed one of his fingers on Russia's chest. "So... you have to..." Russia sighed and then shoved America forwards. "Let's at least sit in the corner. I normally don't go here." America smiled in triumph.

"Wait a minute..." The western country stopped, grabbed a plate and put the mashed potatoes from the counter on it. "Are you telling me you don't eat in school?" Russia just shrugged. "Sometimes I make myself a sandwich, sometimes I forget to. America looked at him like he was crazy. "Uhh, America? Are you okay?" The taller country looked at him a bit uncomfortable.

America gasped and then screamed: "Dude! How can you endure to not eat during school?!" He grabbed a second plate, shoved it into Russia's hands and then put a extreme big portion of mashed potatoes on his plate. He took it a bit hesitant and awkwardly eyed the other countries staring at them. "Can you maybe not yell all the time?" He glared at America, who didn't answer and just grabbed him by the elbow. "Come on, come on!"

They sat down on a small table in the corner. Apparently no one ever sits here, because it was a bit dusty. America didn't mind and sat down as comfortable as possible. He instantly began eating and then eyed Russia in confusion as he didn't begin eating too. "Do you not like mashed potatoes?" He asked while munching. "I don't really mind what I eat." Russia said as he raised his spoon and pointed at Japan. "Look."

"Huh?" America looked over to Japan who proudly hold up America's failed cardboard butterfly. It was decorated with red glitter now. She showed it to South Korea, who clapped and then she hung it up in the middle of the room. It was hanging at a weird angle and as North Korea walked passed it, he just boo'd. She gave him the tongue.

America almost spit out his potatoes at the sight. The taller country just laughed. "I bet you ten oil cans she has a huge crush on you, there is no other way someone could like something so ugly." The western country shook his head quickly. "No, I don't think so." Russia raised an eyebrow at that. "Are you sure?" America nodded with an uncomfortable smile and then stuffed some more of the cafeteria food in his mouth.

"I think you know exactly what Japan feels for you. You just don't want it to be true." Russia grinned and also took a bit from his mashed potatoes. America went weirdly quiet at that and placed his spoon on the table. "To be honest with you, Russia..." He gulped and stared at his table while trying to come up with something to say.

Russia blinked at him. "Hey, I'm sorry if I said anything wrong..." He didn't know why, but as he looked at America struggling with words like that he actually felt kind of bad. America took a deep breath, raised his head quickly and then said in a hurry: "I'm gay."

The other country looked at him in confusion. "So?" America stared back at him in disbelief. "So?! This is all you have to say?!" Russia raised his hands in defense. "Well, what do you want me to say? Congratulations?!" America stood up slapped his hands on the table. "What about your gay propaganda law?!" He asked back loudly and Russia roughly placed his hands on America's shoulders to force him to sit back down. "This is why I hate you. You are are so goddamn loud." He gritted through his teeth as he felt the other countries eyes on them two.

America immediately sat back down and stared down at the table in shame. "I'm sorry." There was silence between the two and Russia waited until the other countries stopped gawking before speaking up. "Listen, I don't care if you are gay. I just don't like you generally." America sighed and slapped his hands in his face. "Wow, that makes it a lot better."

"Don't act like the victim here if you are the one blackmailing me." The eastern country said and crossed his arms. America removed his hands from his face and looked up. "But I just want to be your friend!" He said with frustration in his voice. "You're such a stuck-up." "Yeah, insult me. That will definitely make me your friend."

The tension between the two countries was extreme until Japan suddenly appeared at their table. She looked worried. "Are you two fighting again?" She asked and fiddled around with her hands. Japan eyed America and then whispered: "If he is forcing you to anything, I can tell the teacher."

Russia still heard it. He groaned in annoyance and tried to keep his anger inside as he furiously took a spoon full of mashed potatoes. America awkwardly shook his head. "Nah, we are fine. Sorry." He giggled a bit nervously and gave her a grin while keeping an hold on his sunglasses.

She gave him a sad smile, quickly nodded and then walked back to South Korea. "Her cheeks were red." America turned his head to Russia. "Huh?" "Her cheeks were red." He repeated. "She really does like you, duh."


	12. Chapter 12

The last lesson of the day for Russia was English, to be more specific, Grammar. Needless to say, it was really boring. The teacher was G9. Just like the other teachers, like UN and NATO, he is considered to be a international organization. He is a quite young teacher, since he has been born 1965 and has been adopted by the UN. Everyone just kind of forgot he existed in 2012 after Yugoslavia broke contact with him. Apparently G9 decided to become a teacher afterwards. Russia didn't really care.

The tall country grabbed for the old novel in his bag and sighed heavily as he realized the cover had a wrinkle. He probably threw it too forcefully in his bag as NATO yelled at him for having it out during chemistry class. At least no paper ripped out of the book. He opened it and quietly read during the lesson.

G9 asked Russia once if he could put the book away, but his voice was too quiet and even cracked while doing so. The eastern country made up a lie about the book being a grammar book. The teacher let it slip. He was too afraid of Russia to speak up and continued his lesson. Russia wasn't sure how to feel about that. The fact that not just students, but also teachers were afraid of him kind of hurt. Well, at least he could read this book in peace.

The bell rang and Russia didn't want to stop the book just yet. Soviet has scribbled super awkward poems into the book and the description of his crush just screamed “I'm Third Reich.” Russia gawked at it like he has seen the end of the world. Of course he knew there has been a romantic interest between these two, but this is just ridiculous. “Russia?” G9 asked, he moved over to Russia's desk.

“W-was the grammar book good?” He stuttered and Russia blinked at him. He knew that G9 recognized that this wasn't a grammar book. Of course it isn't if the title said “Red at heart” in big capital letters. Russia knew he should be nice to him. He was still young after all, but he was just so pissed today. So he clapped the book together and just left. G9 blinked in confusion, but didn't ran after him.

“Russia!” America dashed over to him from the room across him. “We should go home together and-” He stopped talking as he eyed the red book in Russia's hands. “What's that?” The taller country quickly put the book in his backpack and shrugged. “Just a grammar book.” America knew that was a lie, but he didn't ask about it again. “So?” Russia just kind of looked at the wall, staring past America.“So what?”

America sighed and grabbed for Russia's elbow. “Can I come to your house?” Now he got Russia's attention and he stared down at him. “What? Why?” America looked at him with an annoyed expression. “Stop playing stupid. This is how I will built our friendship, alright?” Russia rolled his eyes. “There's nothing interesting at my home. We should go to yours if you want to spend your free time not so horribly.”

Now it was America's turn to look uncomfortable. “About that... My Dad kind of hates you.” Russia didn't look surprised at all. “A lot of people hate me, what's the big deal?” The smaller country groaned in frustration. “Jeez, can I just PLEASE come to your fucking house?” He asked and Russia had to let out a small giggle. He let it die down quickly and then he answered: “Okay, sure. Whatever.” He actually wanted to read the book, but apparently if you have a blackmailing friend this is the kind of free time you get assigned to.

Russia actually would love to have a real friend, but this thing that America started just doesn't seem right. He didn't believe that America just blackmailed him to be his friend, because that would make him either absolutely stupid or absolutely desperate for a friend. And let's be honest, America has a lot of friends... Right?

While they walked down the corridor, they spotted Japan with South Korea again. America accidentally made eye contact, but quickly looked away before it could turn into something awkward. “Come on.” The western country said with an smile and took Russia's hand into his own. He speed up and Russia stumbled after him with a confused look. He stared down at his hands. It looked like they were holding hands. Like a couple.

As he looked back to Japan there was no doubt that she was jealous. Russia turned his head back forwards in embarrassment, just to spot Ukraine standing next to the exit with Germany and Poland. The three stared intensely at the two taller countries. Russia thought this would be a perfect example of what you would call a drilling glare. With a swift movement he let go off America's hand and opened the door. “After you.”

“Thanks.” America walked outside, but Russia didn't immediately follow him. Instead he turned to his sister. “Are you coming home tonight?” He asked and pointed at Germany and Poland. Her constant sleepovers annoyed him. She crossed her arms. “Why are you asking?” Her brother huffed. “Am I not allowed to ask my sister that?” Her left eye was still a bit blue from the day Russia had let his fist end up in her face during soccer. “To be fair.” Poland started.

“This is the most broken family in history.” All of the 3 heads turned to Poland's direction. Even Ukraine was surprised at his choice of words. Russia gave him a intense glare and Poland took a step back. “She can answer on her own, you know? The fuck you know anyway Poland?” Russia spit out the name of the other country. America stared into the corridor while standing in front of the door. He wasn't sure if he should get involved or not.

“I don't know if you forgot, but I was under your Dad's dominion more than once and that for quite a long time! I know what it is like to starve! Just like your sister! She had it even worse, but you still like him, because you were his favorite! Maybe because you are just like him!” America gulped. Not this again. “I...” Russia's voice broke, but he got himself together. “I'm not gonna apologize for missing my Dad, okay?” He was visibly angry and Germany stepped in front of Poland as if to protect him. This is only made him angrier. “Are you kidding me?” He hated it when he was portrayed like the villain. He was always had to play the role of the villain.

He clenched his hands together. Poland didn't stop his little rant there. “You want Crimea back from Ukraine, right? Doesn't this make you just as greedy for power as him? You fucking asshole.” Russia widened his eyes. It's not like that. Poland got it wrong. It's just... It's just... Russia couldn't think of a comeback. At this point Russia wasn't even sure anymore if he maybe really was the villain here.

Germany placed a hand on Poland's shoulders. “Calm down... We don't want to start a war with Russia. You are right with what you say, but you know the rule: The bigger your army, the better your army. The truth doesn't matter if you are under ground. You know what he's like.”

America spotted NATO walking towards them. The teacher would ask what happened. He began sweating as he saw Russia's fists trembling. He would probably punch Poland if he would say one more thing. Ukraine wasn't sure want to do. She loved her friends, but this was...

America grabbed for Russia's hand before it would be too late. He dragged him outside and just ran until there were out of sight. Russia resisted at first, but then followed the smaller country. They ran for at least 10 minutes straight and suddenly just stopped in front of a big tree.

“Fuck.” Russia said out of breath before rubbing his hands over his eyes. “Are you okay?” America asked and gently grabbed for Russia's wrists to remove the hands from his face. His sleeves dropped at the movement and America was able to see Russia's arms covered with badly placed sticking plasters. Some cuts were still visible, because the sticking plasters wouldn't cover them properly. “Wow, you are bad at this.” America blurted out.

Russia immediately reacted to that and forcefully pulled his arms away to pull the sleeves back up. “Shut up, America.” The smaller country gulped. “Sorry, I didn't mean it like that...” There was silence between them. America eyed Russia more precisely. He didn't look angry anymore, just sad and tired.

“I don't think you are like your father.” America finally said and Russia looked at him in surprise. He didn't know what to say. They stared at each other for another whole minute, before Russia spoke up. “America. Be honest with me, why do you want to be my friend so badly that you would blackmail me into it?” He asked the question slowly. He had been thinking about it ever since it had happened. He liked the idea of having a friend, but this whole thing sounded... scary. Yes, especially America telling everyone he self harmed was a scary thought. He didn't want to accept that feeling of being afraid of something so much, so he just had turned it into anger, but it didn't make the whole thing any better.,,

America opened his mouth, but nothing came out. Instead tears came out of his eyes. “Jeez.” Russia walked over to America and tried to wipe them away. “Why are you crying now?” He asked with a sad smile. He wasn't mad at America for crying. The western country's cheeks heated up. “It's just... I'm really lonely and I feel like you understand that feeling actually quite a lot.” He was embarrassed about opening up like this, so everything came out with a stutter.

He gently removed Russia's hands from his cheeks and them wiped his tears away on his own. “You know I never really cut myself, but sometimes I will just hit my head against the wall...” He said carefully Russia listened to him without interrupting. Tears were building up in America's eyes again. “I know it sounds stupid-” “No.” Russia quickly said. “Hey, it's okay. If you are stupid, I'm stupid too.” America giggled like crazy. “I can't believe I just told you that.” Russia smiled. “Me neither.”


End file.
